Archive for the 'Self-Discovery' Category

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Time Management for Geniuses

There are twenty four hours in everyone’s day, but often it seems as if we can’t get everything we want to get completed in that time period. To really live a balanced life, which is what many of us strive for, we make time for work, make time to care for our bodies through eating and fitness, make time to rest, and make time to socialize with our family and friends. With all of those activities, it seems like twenty four hours is not enough time. But even if we had more time in a day we would still rush around doing the same habits. So time is not really what we need to focus our attention on. Our attention needs to be focused on the activities we do throughout the day.

As a professor, business owner, writer, daughter, sister, aunt and friend, I want to get everything done, sometimes all in one day. Yet, I have learned that when I overload my list of activities, I run myself down—physically and mentally. When I run myself down, I’m unable to perform my activities on the level to which I would prefer.

So each week I make myself a list of priorities, which I call, “My List of Dreams to Fulfill.” Knowing what my overall goals are, I list all the activities I would like to complete in order to fulfill them. I then rank the list in order of priorities. I almost never complete the entire list by the end of each week, but the most important activities that I’ve identified as important are always done. And the activities that I have ranked and not finished are either removed from my list due to its lack of importance or move up in rank for the following week. Allow yourself to be okay completing the top three. That’s an accomplishment wroth of celebration.

Another key to managing your activities is asking for help. You’ll be surprised at how your family and friends really want to be a part of helping you fulfill your dreams. And for my professional business activities, I hire others who specialize in activities they complete far quicker than I would, especially with my busy schedule.
Hiring someone to do your work in college is definitely not a wise idea because, in addition to cheating, you will never know the information yourself. However, seeking extra help from your professor or your school’s tutoring center will allow you to complete your work with more confidence and in a timely manner. If there is someone in your class who seems to understand the material that you may be struggling with, get their contact information and arrange a study session together.

People explain things in different ways. Hearing the information from someone else might give you some clarity and allow you to complete your work in a timely manner. The more you understand, the easier it will be for you to complete your work.

So go ahead and create your own personal “Dreams to Fulfill” list, and seek help from others around you.

Express True Self Through Journaling

One of the best ways to identify your true self is through journaling. Many people write in journals and only look at them months later. But the truth is you may find numerous treasures if you revisit your previous entries often.

When writing in your journal, it is important to write about whatever comes to mind. I recommend writing at the end of your day, before going to bed, so that you can include as many of the day’s events. Try to remember as much as you can about your day, using Post-it Notes to jot down certain things that impacted you throughout the day.

Make sure that your journal includes three important pieces of information:

  • Include every event that impacted you. If it was important enough to remember or you made a note of it during the day, it influenced you in some meaningful way.
  • Write down the feelings you had surrounding each event you mentioned in your journal. Then take as much time as you need to think about why you felt the way you felt. There is always a lesson hidden in the emotion you feel when an event takes place.
  • Log the reactions you had to each event. Determine if that is the reaction that you’d like to have if that event occurred again. If not, then write down how you’d like to change that reaction.

In order to make journal writing a consistent part of your weekly schedule, assign a certain amount of days that you commit to writing. Allow one additional day that will give you the opportunity to review your entries from that week. Reflect on them.

Between the margins, point out the parts of your true self that you embrace and want to keep a part of your being. Also, include notes about the parts of your true self that you’d like to change. When considering making alterations, think about some of the people you admire, whether you know them or not. The things we admire in others are aspects that we already possess in ourselves somewhat but may not yet express as much as we’d like to.

Tapping Into Your True Self

Your true self is being exactly who you want to be. Some of the choices about who you want to be might be derived from your past, and some of the choices of who you want to be might be based on your personality.

Don’t doubt it for a minute that who you are influences what you do and how you do it. Let’s use a career example to show you exactly what I mean. If I have a student who does not value education and is only in school because his or her parents told him or her that is what he or she had to do after high school, that student is going to do is the bare minimum to pass classes. This is not you’re “A” or “B” student but the student who may or may not pass the class.

The student does this is by exerting only the slightest effort. The student does not study, does assignments last minute, and does not accept tutoring services when offered. The student just described has inner conflict and is not living a fulfilled and happy life in school or in any other aspect of his or her life.

Everyone has a foundation that makes up a part of who we are created from the environment from which we were raised, our families, our friends, the society around us, our religious background, our beliefs, and our morals and values. But what many people do not understand is that our foundation can be changed. Some parts of this foundation might work well for you right now in your life. If that’s the case, keep those aspects of your foundation. But for the parts of your foundation that aren’t working in your life, get rid of them so that you can be who you want to be.

Being your true self is so important, because it allows you to expose the gifts you have to offer to the world. If you keep them inside and don’t share them with anyone else, the world will miss your contribution.

One of the biggest blocks that prevents people from being who they want to be is fear of judgment from others. Some people worry about what their parents might think about their decisions, and others fear what their peers might think about their decisions. Fear of the peers is often referred to as peer pressure. No matter what age, many people feel they have to do what everyone else is doing so they can fit in. Most people think this only happens with teens and young adults, but the truth is that for a large chunk of life we all try to fit in at work, in our social groups, and within our families.

If you fear what others might think of you and your decisions, you are not tapped into your true self. If you live your life they way you want to live it, you’ve found the freedom that has been your right since you arrived on this Earth.

Tapping into your true self takes courage, because it may go against the grain of others you know and love. But if you feel you are living life the way it is supposed to be for you, keep going. You are on the right track.

Turning Challenges Into Opportunities

Everyone, at some point in time, faces a challenge. Throughout our lives, we have learned to resist challenges because we’d prefer everything to go smoothly. But that’s just not reality.

When faced with a challenge, the first step is to accept the challenge and embrace it. It might sound crazy, because challenges are usually viewed as a source of causing some level of difficulty in our lives. Only after the challenge has been embraced can you deal with it on a higher sense of consciousness. Looking at the challenge or problem from a different perspective will reveal the multitude of choices you have in front of you. It’s all about how you react to the situation.

One of my favorite quotes by Albert Einstein is, “You cannot solve a problem from the same consciousness that created it. You must learn to see the world anew.” This simply means looking at the challenge or problem in front of you with a new set of eyes, a set that is willing to look outside the box in order to come up with the solution that works best for you.

I may be a life coach, but I’m also human like everybody else. I like it when my life runs smoothly without problems. But I also realize that my life will only run as smoothly as my mind is willing to allow. If I can open my mind up to the opportunities that a challenge has to offer, I don’t need to get stressed out about the situation.

Recently, I made an appointment for a very important meeting to be held on a Thursday. The meeting meant a lot to me in a variety of ways. I was grateful to have it. In order to prepare for this meeting, I had asked a friend to send me 4 lbs. worth of documents from New Jersey to Florida.

She shipped it on a Monday, and we both anticipated and were told that I would receive it that Tuesday evening two days ahead of my meeting. I was charged for the price of the overnight delivery. I had no doubt in my mind that it was going to arrive Tuesday evening and planned on picking it up from the front desk of my building after my USTREAM.tv show I hold live every Tuesday night.

As I was writing this very exact article, I had so much to say about turning challenges into opportunities that I got a bit of writer’s block. My usual remedy for writers block is to scan the Internet for awhile, and then go back to what I’m writing. Often I’ll see something that will spark an idea or lead me to the next thing I want to express.

Believing that everything happens for a reason and there are no coincidences, I don’t think checking my personal email instead of scanning the Internet just happened by chance. I checked my email and realized that my friend had been sending emails all day and was in touch with UPS to rectify a challenge that occurred with the shipping of the package. Although I was charged full price for overnight shipping, the package was sent ground and was scheduled to arrive Thursday night. But my meeting was scheduled for Thursday morning.

Because of my fear about how not having the papers would negatively affect the meeting, I was about to express my frustration with the customer service representative at the company. But I thought consciously thought through the situation first, before reacting. I chose to consider the opportunities I could gain from the situation. It turned out I gained two opportunities.

First, I was able to negotiate a solution with the manager. As soon as I was transferred to her, she began to explain to me that there was nothing she could do and told me to deal with the store from where the package was shipped. She said, “I’m sorry, but I’m not the one who made the mistake.”

Speaking with her on a higher energy level, I acknowledged that she definitely was not at fault, but assured her that as a manager working out of the national office of her company, she was more than capable to help me resolve the situation. Positive communication in a challenging situation is always an opportunity to encourage myself and others who may be involved.

It did. Immediately, the confidence level in her voice perked up and her desire to help was apparent in her voice. And that’s exactly what she did. She took five minutes to think outside of the box, and resolved the situation almost immediately.

Another opportunity I gained from the situation was that I no longer had writer’s block. I believe in the theory of whatever intention you put out into the Universe is what you are going to receive back. I was looking for something to write with a good example of a recent challenge, and I was presented with one.

With any challenge my clients face, I have them write down the challenge so that they can embrace and understand it better. Then I have them write out any opportunities they can see from the situation. Depending on the circumstance, some challenges may be easier to see opportunities from than others. As a result, I am there to ask them questions to reveal the different opportunities they are willing to view from their perspective.

Dealing With Challenging Personalities

For some people, it’s important to be right and prove themselves to everyone else. For others, being peaceful and avoiding confrontation matters even more. And for some people, they fit into either category, depending on the matter being discussed.

You must decide for yourself which category feels most appropriate for you. Even if someone else wants to challenge you in a confrontation, take the time to recognize that the confrontation can only take place if you involve yourself in it too. It’s easier to choose peace if you look at the challenging person and your situation with the person you have identified as challenging as an opportunity to learn something about yourself.

Whether the “challenging person” is someone you choose to surround yourself with or someone who just happens to be in your class at school or in your workplace, you technically have a relationship with him or her. Remember that relationships teach you more about yourself. The characteristics you love about someone else are characteristics you possess within yourself. The “funny” thing is that the thing that irks you about that “challenging person,” is a characteristic you possess, too.

A longtime childhood friend of mine finds every opportunity to be right and finding peace is not as much of a value for her than it is for me. The one thing that used to irk me the most about her was that she always tried to tell everyone what to do with their life. As a life coach, that’s completely against the grain of what I believe. I believe everyone has their own answers inside of themselves. After seriously looking at myself and my personality, I realized this bothered me so much because I also sometimes thought I knew—and expressed—what the best answer was for people, especially when it came to family and friends. I turned this realization into an opportunity to change that unappealing characteristic. If I despised that quality in others, I surely didn’t want it anymore for myself.

Through meditation and affirmations to change my way of thinking, I learned to love people for who they are no matter what decision they made. I learned that I am responsible for me, and each person on this earth is responsible for themselves. This lesson improved my life coaching skills, and also my time spent with family and friends. It was obvious my family and friends felt more comfortable around me, because of my change of attitude. The most interesting part, to me, was that I no longer judged my childhood friend. I didn’t even notice that characteristic within her anymore.

We all know or have met someone in our lives that we have found it difficult to get along with. Take it as an opportunity to learn something more about yourself, look for where that characteristic shows up in your life, and use it to make yourself who you really want to be.