Tag Archive for 'negative self-talk'

First Agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word

Last Monday, a group of us began reading The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

In the chapter, “Domestication and Dream of the Planet,” we discussed our self-limiting beliefs. These are beliefs we picked up from our families, society, school, work, etc. The reason why they’re self-limiting is because these opinions, or agreements as Ruiz refers to them as, are not really the truth about life and limit us from fully being and expressing ourselves.

Our homework was to read the chapter, “The First Agreement,” and to be conscious of the first agreement throughout the week, which is to be impeccable with your word.

Ruiz defines impeccability as “without sin.” He says, “A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself.”

My favorite part of being a teacher/life coach is that I get the opportunity to share the experience with my class. After reading, “The First Agreement,” I see how I use the word against myself and my capabilities.

I use it when it comes to the things I can and cannot accomplish with my business. I use the word to gossip about others when I do not agree with their opinions. If someone uses the word against me and I agree, there I go again using the word to reject myself. In reality, the poison that person says to me has nothing to do with me, but has everything to do with them.

One example that I’ve encountered many times is at work. If my co-workers have disliked the boss or someone else in the workplace, it captures my attention and then off to the races I go with the belief that the person is whatever someone else said about them.

A couple weeks ago, the timing belt in my car broke. I had only bought the car a month prior to this happening. My cousin, who works on cars, checked the car out before I bought it. When I found out that fixing this timing belt was going to cost me around $3,000 if I’m lucky, I spread the poison to my cousin.

Since then I have apologized, but depending on what mindset he was in when I spread the poison, this could have been completely detrimental to him and what he thought of his abilities. Thankfully, he forgave me and realized that I was having a rough week.

“Mostly we use the word to spread our personal poison – to express anger, jealousy, envy, and hate,” Ruiz said. The word is pure magic – the most powerful gift we have as humans – and we use it against ourselves.

For me, there are two important actions that lead us to be more impeccable with our word.

The first one is creating positive affirmations with ourselves. When we feel good about ourselves and truly love who we are, we are more patient, tolerant, loving, and open-minded when it comes to others. Creating these positive affirmations can turn around our perspective of what is really ailing us that most on the inside.

The second one is surrounding ourselves around people who have similar goals: to become more spiritually free.

People always thank me for helping them on their journey and are surprised when I thank them. I thank them because they are open-minded to change, which continues to inspire me to do the same.



In the second week of this teleclass I’m doing with Jana Fleming, we’re practicing non-judgement. It is a practice that allows us to not judge anything that occurs. Since we were children, we were always taught to judge that something was good or bad based on beliefs we were taught from out family, friends, society, etc. Believe me, it’s easier said than done.

In the nine years I worked as a professor, I’ve observed judgement all of the time. Students would judge themselves as stupid if they got even a B on their assignment. Being as though I was teaching basic skills courses, students were very judgemental about how they did not needed the course.

For others not to judge us, we grow up trying to fit into certain circles of friends. This creates us to loose who we really are and who we really want to be. We judge other people to fit the roles we expect them to play.

Today I encourage you to be the observer in your classrooms and when you are hanging around your social circles. What are you saying about yourself? What are you saying about other people? The more you judge yourself, the more you judge others.

If you catch yourself judging, don’t judge yourself for that. Just be mindful that today you are setting an intention to not judge anything that occurs throughout your day. The more you practice this you’ll be less judgemental of your teachers. You’ll be able to communicate with your teachers and your social circles much better. Because you have made the decision that right and wrong don’t exists. All that exists is the story being played out in front of you.

Take the non-judgement challenge today!

Did You See Turning Around Negative Self Talk on Dream Purposeful Phenomenon Tuesday Night? Catch the Recorded Version Now!

Research shows that a person has anywhere up to 60,000 thoughts per day. The thing about these thoughts of ours is that most of them are the same 60,000 thoughts from day to day. The question is: what are you thinking about?

In our current society, most people’s thoughts are centered around worry, fear, and stress over a variety of topics. We worry about work. We worry about school. We worry about family and other close relationships. And the list could go on. A lot of that worry and fear stems from how we feel about ourselves.

Learn the five steps to building positive affirmations for yourself and your life. Watch the recorded version at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/create-the-career-of-your-dreams-phenomenon.

How do I turn around negative self-talk?

Sometimes we do not realize that we sabotage our own success by the
negative words we speak to ourselves. We wonder if we are good
enough to accomplish our goals and sometimes doubt that there are
opportunities available to us.

This is only based on fear. If you can turn this negative self talk
around into positive self talk, it will build your confidence and
help you break through the obstacle standing in your way – your
negative thoughts.

Record your negative self thoughts in the positive affirmation
available here.

When you catch yourself thinking negatively, write the thought on
the right hand side of the journal. Think of a positive way in
which you could turn that thought around and write it on the left
side of the paper.

Fold the paper in half vertically so you can only see the positive
affirmations you have created for yourself. Look at them and repeat
them at least three times per day. The more you read them aloud,
the more true they will become in your life.